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The Blame Game


When was the last time that you blamed someone for what they did and it worked for you?

As we watch our current chosen leaders the only thing that seems to be consistent is the fact that each side accuses the other of wrong doing. This reminds me of watching my children in grade school.

When we were in the fifth grade, the only choice we had to get our point across and stay out of trouble was to blame the other side.

It worked well for my brother when we were growing up, each time he did something that was inappropriate, the only tool he had was to blame me. For him it worked because my mother never doubted what he had to say. Some families have the “golden child,” in my family it was my brother. What actually takes place is that when something works for us, we continue to repeat the same pattern.

Our lives are formed and lived with a series of repeated beliefs, behaviors, patterns and habits. As individuals we never change what works until or unless at some point our choice stops working. Then we have to consider another way of believing or behaving.

As children we model our parents even when we do not like what they do, it is the only role model that we have. This continues throughout our life with our choices and how we create our values and our morals.

I know that for me, my choice for a life partner was based on the role model of my mother. My father died when I was fourteen so there was not a lot of time to model his patterns and behaviors. However, one thing I learned very well from my mother was that the world, according to her, was a very simple black and white world. It was either her way of doing or it was wrong. There never was a middle ground. I knew from the start that I wanted to be different, I did everything I knew to be “not” like her. I wanted to find people in my life who viewed the world with multiple colors, lots of choices and perspectives.

I found a man that I thought was more like what I had envisioned than what I knew. I think many of us follow this type of reasoning. What I was completely unaware of however, were the unconscious beliefs, patterns and behaviors that were deeply embedded in my psyche. Consequently, I chose what was familiar to me. Like it or not we tend to choose what is

comfortable and familiar to us; I chose someone who was more of a missing father and more of a true black/white thinker than I knew. My husband was 16 years older and he definitely had beliefs, patterns and behaviors that were akin to my mother’s.

As an example, this was in 1970 and I being a product of the 60’s, an era of definite change in our American youth’s ways of life, had my own views and wanted to work. I always had worked, I am what some have called a workaholic. However, my husband, being of a different mind-set believed that women from his family background did not work. I was not one of the stay-at-home barefoot and pregnant type of women. This was the very beginning of a long and deep learning curve for me.

These beliefs, patterns and habits have made it much easier to blame the other one for our turbulence and unhappiness. While my marriage continued on for 15 years, the road to happiness only got dimmer.

Our lives are fueled by over 20,000 years of opposites, of dual expressions and experiences. These are ego-human ways of living. As humans we chose to learn how to live with an ego-driven life; one of wanting more and more “things and power” declaring an individual’s or group’s rights to possession of items and humans as normal and acceptable. We have been learning how life on a third domain is lived when harm of others and granting power over another living being has been considered not only proper or correct, but the way God created us to be. This is the world we know of as a dual third domain world. A world of opposites and division.

Over the last few decades of my life I have had many opportunities to reconsider how I view my life and my choices. I have come to know that as much as we want to change and alter our beliefs, habits and patterns, they are steeped in deep and long held emotions and behaviors.

At some point in our life, each of us considers what is important. What do we actually believe and hold to be true for ourselves? Is it true that there is a God who believes that one has rights to power over another? Is it true that God created some to have more of everything while others live in degrees of poverty; whether it be financial, intellectual or the poverty of Soul’s wisdom?

We are taught in many religions that God is all powerful and is Love, yet we are told by the same people that God is a vengeful God. How can both of these be true? Many different faiths teach that we are born of sin, yet the Christians, for instance, tell us that Christ, the son of God, died for our sins. How can both be true or is this another one of the ego-human ways of keeping

humans divided and in different classes of more and less than, powerful and weak, deserving and those who are less deserving of God’s love and bounty.

When I teach a class on Ethics, for instance, I always ask my participants what do they believe for themselves. Do you go to the same church as your parents because that is how you were raised or is what that particular religion preaches actually true for you, deep in your Soul and your own true knowing? What morals and values do you hold as fact and non-negotiable for you? Is it absolutely imperative that those in your world be honest? Is it OK for those in your life to tell lies? Most of my class would say it is never OK to be dishonest, yet for some it is OK to lie; they don’t view it the same as being dishonest; it is called a “white lie”. Are you of the same political party because your family has “always” been a…

I ask if it is OK in their world, their circle of influence, for people to steal? For some it is OK if it is just a little thing, for others never steal a thing; and yet we have people all of the time stealing our ideas, our beliefs, our morals while we say and do nothing. Why?

For over 20,000 years we have lived a tribal existence and in a dual world of opposites and conditions forgetting Soul-Truth and Soul-Knowing. As co-creator, evolutionary beings we chose to create a world of opposites so we can learn what it is to live as ego-driven humans, we have given our individual power away to those who we believe to be more deserving. In a life where it is easier to blame the other guy than to stand up for our own morals and values; we have forgotten our own Soul Truths and knowing.

For centuries it has been the norm to steal a woman’s or child’s virginity and self-respect. It was considered “normal” because women and children were possessions; women and children were property. For many of us globally this continues because it is tradition. It is how an ego-driven human justifies its power over another. Some actually believe it is based in their spiritual beliefs.

What I know from my own Soul wisdom, is that we are in a time of unprecedented change. Each of us is at a point in our life where we have real choices, new opportunities, for what we think, how we believe, what our values and our morals are. There is no right or wrong in your choice; you simply choose what is right for you in your Soul knowing. Soul, a co-creator evolutionary being knows based upon Soul Truth and Soul Knowing what is in divine order, what is Soul Truth, and what is of the ego. Soul has no capacity to judge another or to impose its own will. There is no such energy in the cosmos, it only exists in the ways of the ego and in a dual ego-human driven world for the purpose of learning and experience.

What it is like to live a life without Soul’s wisdom and knowing? What is it like to live in a world of forgetfulness of who each of us is? This was what we Souls chose; a third domain to know and experience these very emotions, beliefs, patterns and habits. What we have learned is that now we, co-creator, evolutionary beings have the choice to be of greater service to all life. This was our purpose for choosing the experiences of power and more.

We are living in a time where the world as we once knew it is disintegrating before our very eyes. The decades of fighting and the squabbling get louder because it is how it has always been done. For some reason the more we blame the other side, the more correct we are. The louder we get the more accurate it is. Like children, we resort to what we remember as ways that worked for us; but it doesn’t work because the blame game is dying along with our old traditions. As humans we cannot stay the same. It is the anthesis of who we are as Soul. I know this because I watch it every day in the actions of those in power and who we chose as our leaders. I know this because I have made my choice to live from Soul’s wisdom. For over 60 years I have made my life one of discovery, learning and remembering who I am and it gets more exciting as I remember more of who I am as Soul.

Some religions teach us that we are humans and have a soul. This is also the anthesis of truth. Each of us is Soul, a Divine Loving, Creative and Joyful expression of perfection. Each of us was gifted with the greatest and most powerful gifts imaginable. We each have FREE WILL and the power to CO-CREATE. We each are free to design our life according to our self. Never is there a Divine Energy that will tell us what is right or wrong, that would be the anthesis of free will. It would take from us our ability to create what it is that we choose. It will, however, say if one is aligned with truth of soul or not.

Our gifts of free will and the ability to co-create are how we are fashioned. We are created out of Diving Love, an unconditional all expressing, all consuming love that is everything, everywhere. We are created of Compassion, a Divine Wisdom that says we each have the compassion and soul-knowing to do and to be what is in right order for our self. We are created from the Joy of the greatest energy of Divine Love because the Godhead energy who created each of us is pure joy. Each Soul is a co-creator, evolutionary being, a living, breathing expression of divine perfection. In this perfection we each are free to create our own life according to self and our choices.

There are no mistakes, no failures, no one to blame because each of us has the free will to create our life according to what is in divine right order for each of us. We were even free to create a world of dual energies; one of more than or less than and power over another. We chose this for the purposes of soul’s experience of knowing what it is like to live without Soul-Truth and Soul-Knowing

We are now remembering who we are and all of the fighting and the discord that is prevalent in our world today is how we as humans are choosing to lay down and dissolve the past experiences of having to have more, be more and claim power over another. That was the old third domain world we created to learn what power and more was like. What was it like to have humans declare that some were more powerful, more important, deserved more or are more loved and accepted by our Creator that others?

We are done with that now. There is no one to blame and the blame game is over. There is a Universal Supply in the energy of Divine Love and no one is left behind or without, it is impossible. This is true Soul Living and when you quiet yourself and listen to the voice within, you too will know it.

Now we are in the new fifth domain; a world being created by each of us who choose this way based in the truth of Divine Love, Divine Compassion and Divine Joy in a world where there is never harm to another living expression of life. We have for eons asked for a world of peace, yet we first have to release, dissolve, the old ways before we can create what we choose. This is the way of Soul. What will you choose?


© 2019. Jane F Cundy. All rights reserved

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